An Aid To Memory

Charles has blogged about reactions to his becoming Catholic. I thought it would be neat to write an entry about reactions to my conversion.

Despite living in an area that can be hostile to Catholics, the responses to my conversion have been largely positive. My family is supportive of course, although I don’t think they fully understand why anybody my age would abandon individualistic evangelical theology and praxis for a more structured, traditional way of doing things. Nonetheless, they have been supportive and open.

My friends’ reactions have been positive as well. My secular friends are a bit mystified, but they have always been mystified as to the place religion plays in my life. My Christian friends’ reactions have been positive and understanding. Steve (who attends a pentecostal church) was kind of surprised, but was encouraging, even visiting Mass with us one Sunday. One of the main reasons is that of all the Christians he has encountered, my brother and I have been probably the least judgmental. His church is pretty legalistic about drinking, and he quite rightly sees nothing wrong in having a beer now and then. He has asked us about a few doctrinal issues, and we have had some good discussions about both of our churches. Usually the response from Christian friends is simply anticlimactic; they are glad we are happy, and have no objections or concerns, and speak positively about Catholics they have known or worked with.

One friend and co-worker was really shocked. He has been a friend of the family for years and got red in the face with shock and laughed when he found out my brother and I converted. He was really surprised, since in this area, kids of evangelicals don’t usually become Catholic. To be honest, around here they usually become practical agnostics, but that is another post entirely. But his reaction was surprise, not judgment. Another co-worker also found out, and found it fascinating, and talked about how we worship the same Lord, etc. Later she told me how her Methodist church blessed animals one Sunday. I thought that was cool.

My Episcopal friends were not surprised, because they have witnessed my displeasure with the Anglican church for some time, and they have been very encouraging. I still encourage them in their ministries as well, and we have remained good friends.

Honestly, there have been no negative responses yet. Some people just don’t know though. I do not hide my being Catholic, nor do I announce it to everyone inappropriately. I didn’t announce my Episcopalianism or Evangelicalism to the world when I was involved in those groups either. As more people find out, I could encounter some negative reactions, but honestly, with my background and spiritual journey, I am well-equipped to deal with it all.

Image from: http://www.stmarys-slough.org.uk/1/conf.htm

I was watching King of the Hill the other day on FX. They show reruns of it at 7:00 weeknights. In last night’s episode Bobby joins a trendy youth group, complete with trendy slang ("props to JC"), pierced and tattooed leaders who play rock music, etc, all with a Christian spin. It kind of reminded me of the Navigators campus group I was in for a time. Bobby almost instantly joins in, proudly carrying his "extreme teen" Bible and uttering this prayer at dinner one night:

I wanna give a shout-out to the man who makes it all happen. Props be
to you for this most bountiful meal that sits before us. Okay, check
it, God, you’ve got skillz. You represent in these vegetables and in
this napkin and in the dirt that grows the grain that makes the garlic
breadsticks that are on this table today, yes-shizz…Thanks, J-Man.  Peace.

In the end of the episode Bobby sneaks out to "Messiahfest," a take-off on the  Christian Rock Cornerstone festival, to "back-up" the youth group’s rocker leader, "Pastor K." Bobby’s dad Hank finds out and goes to the festival. He drags Bobby off stage, and vows to get Bobby back into his normal church with his own parents. Bobby is angry and pouts the whole drive home. When he gets home, Bobby threatens to get back into this trendy form of Christianity when he is 18. Hank pulls out a box of old photos, toys, and memorabilia to show Bobby, and the conversation goes like this:

BOBBY: When I turn 18, I’m going to do whatever I want for the Lord.  Tattoos, piercings, you name it.

HANK: Well, I’ll take that chance.  Come here, there’s something I want you to see.  (Hank takes down a box from the shelf and opens it up)  Remember this?

BOBBY: My beanbag buddy?  Oh, man, I can’t believe I collected those things.  They’re so lame.

HANK: You didn’t think so five years ago. And how about your
virtual pet? You used to carry this thing everywhere. Then you got
tired of it, forgot to feed it, and it died.

BOBBY (looks at a photo of himself in a Ninja Turtles costume): I look like such a dork.

HANK: I know how you feel. I never thought that "Members Only"
jacket would go out of style, but it did. I know you think stuff you’re
doing now is cool, but in a few years you’re going to think it’s lame. And I don’t want the Lord to end up in this box.

I have never been too keen on "trendy" Christianity. Evangelicals are always trying to keep up with popular trends. Liberals are always trying to keep up with academic trends. Five years ago what looked to be "cutting edge" and was going to "transform the whole church" now looks so hokey and even more ridiculous than any secular fad (like puffy pants or bell-bottoms). I don’t have a problem with piercings and trendy music or anything like that, and people who like these things should be welcomed into the church and accepted as they are (I had an earring at one time myself). Obviously I am not saying pop culture or academic trends are bad or that they don’t have a place in our faith, because I am using a TV show to make this illustration. Where I have a problem is when the churches themselves mimic the culture around them and heavily incorporate secular trends (popular or academic) into their worship and theologies. In these cases Christianity is no better than the culture around it.

Plus, usually the Christian versions of pop culture or academic trends are usually inferior imitations of the real thing. That is why I never liked contemporary Christian music very much. Here is a quote from the episode that nails it:

HANK (spoken to "Pastor K"): Can’t you see you’re not making Christianity better, you’re just making rock n’ roll worse. 

If you wish to be dignified, you can say that one reason I joined the Catholic Church is because it is timeless and enduring, but I guess if you want to say it another way…I joined the Catholic Church because I don’t want the Lord to end up in a box in the garage.

Quotes from: http://www.geocities.com/arlen_texas/reborn.htm
Image from: http://animatedtv.about.com/library/extra/blkohgallery1.htm

The Sacred Heart of Mary Parish in Boulder, CO has taken the ashes of over 1000 aborted fetuses and buried them in a Catholic burial service. The article may be accessed here.

Catholics and others who oppose abortion (such as myself) see this burial as an act of kindness and respect for aborted lives that would otherwise have been thrown in the trash. Others see the burial as an act of political exploitation, using the burial to simply make a political point, and in the process showing disrespect for women who have had abortions. What do you think?

Image obtained from: www.drudgereport.com

Just a reminder to all of my blog readers. Ancient-Future.Net encourages you to Leave a Prayer Request, or else Pray for The Requests Left By Others. The web is a perfect place for us to get our requests out to millions of other praying Christians, and to remember the requests of others in our prayers. We also have a general Prayer Page with prayers for all occasions, including those related to the Christian calendar of holy days.

NOTE: spam posted to the prayer request page will be deleted by the admins.

Image from: http://www.cityofbastrop.org/policedept/annual03/prayer03.htm

Tomorrow (January 18th) happens to be a lot of things: the day I substitute teach second grade (not a big deal), when Maria arrives in South America, and (most importantly!) the beginning of the Octave of Christian Unity, which runs from January 18th-25th. Check out the previous link for some materials that we have put up for this 8 day period seeking Christian unity. We will have prayers, things to do, and Eastern and Western Christian readings designed to promote mutual understanding.

Also in the news today, Catholic Archbishop Basile Georges Casmoussa of the Syrian Catholic Church was kidnapped in Iraq. Let’s pray for his safety and for tranquility in Iraq for their upcoming election and beyond.

The Image is St. John Chrysostom, taken from www.chrysostom.org

Last night I went out with a friend of mine. He wanted some help filling out a government job application. We decided to head out about 8:00 for some wings. When I arrived he mentioned that he didn’t bring the application and just wanted to hang out. I was glad and secretly hoped he would forget those forms anyway. It had been a long week and just hanging out and shooting the breeze suited me pretty well. After we finished our wings we decided to head back into the bar area and listen to the band that was playing. I overheard them playing America’s "Ventura Highway" at one point, so they weren’t too bad.

We sat at a table near the bar, breathing in a lot of smoke. I was sipping only ice water by this point. Our discussion was pretty atypical of what one would be used to hearing at this place. Both of us are Christian. I am Catholic and Steve is Pentecostal. We began discussing how the judgment many Christians place on drinkers is unwarranted and hypocritical (this is something he encounters frequently at his church). On the other hand, we discussed the emptiness we saw around us. We discussed how "living" for weekend partying is a poor way to live a life. We discussed love, and how you likely wouldn’t find genuine love there, unless you happened to meet the other three or four reluctant folks like us who happened to be hanging out there. I was reminded of some of my undergraduate days when I would actually try to meet people in bars and dance clubs, but yet would inwardly be hesitant about the party scene. Steve was happy that I had met Maria and that we were moving toward engagement and marriage, and we discussed how after having children often loving your wife is a choice, since feelings of being "in love" have subsided. He is married with 2 kids.

Overall, I just had a good time, and it was nice to catch up and just relax a little, but I still kept my eyes open as to the implications of what was going on around me. I guess this inclination to reflect can be a blessing or a curse. Happy Sunday!

Well my new Latin-English Benedictine Monastic Diurnal published by the Benedictines at St. Michael’s Abbey, Farnborough finally arrived in the mail this week (after waiting about 2 months). It has all of the daytime Monastic hours, various hymns, and has everything in Latin and English, accent marks and all! I haven’t had a whole lot of time to use it this week, since my dad was in the hospital with a heart scare (thank God it was only a stomach issue). However I am excited to start using the book. To order it for yourself, click here. The price is reasonable if you are paying in British pounds. If you are paying in US dollars the price is a bit high because the US dollar is so weak.

In other random news, I am finishing up all of my grad school applications, and have lost the 4-5 pounds I gained over the holiday season!

The image on the left is a photo from the diurnal, borrowed from the Abbey’s site.

With my brother’s girlfriend Carmel leaving yesterday, my long-distance girlfriend Maria decided to blog a little bit about long-distance relationships (among other things). So I decided to link over to it. Please read what she has to say, and then what I say will make more sense.

Long-distance relationships are becoming more and more common. When you add together traveling for work, meeting on the Internet, and choosing colleges, many people find themselves in long-distance relationships. However, after awhile, these relationships can deteriorate for a number of reasons. Sometimes it is just that, like many short-distance relationships, the couple just didn’t get along. However, I suspect that a lot of the time the distance just wrecks havoc on the relationship, even if it is positive. Maria and I (and Carmel and Jonathan) have decided that we are not going to let this happen.

I of course agree with what Maria says on her blog. My relationship with Maria is definitely worth the distance, and I tell everyone that who asks. Even if Maria lived on an island only reachable by 30 hours of boat travel, it would be worth it. How we would have met under those conditions I don’t know, but you get my point! That does not mean the circumstances surrounding our relationship are always easy. Sometimes the distance can be downright difficult. Maria offers the following tips:

1. Have and See your friends and family
2. Keep busy
3. Accept the suffering as proof of something genuine
4. Pray
5. Communicate

Even these can all be difficult to implement. Due to work and family constraints, many people find it harder and harder to see friends after college. Accepting suffering is never easy, and after awhile we can finally just throw up our hands! And we all know how difficult communication can be, even in a short-distance relationship.

However, as a Christian, I believe that everything mentioned above can help strengthen every relationship in the long-term, whether it is a short-distance or long-distance relationship.

Making an effort to see your family and friends, even when all of them seem just as busy as you are, is a good thing, and can help you foster and maybe even repair past relationships! Keeping busy can be a good or bad thing from a moral standpoint, but if you keep busy with good things, then you are not only benefiting you and your boy/girl-friend, but helping others. Accepting the sacrifice of being apart helps a relationship as well. Couples who have to accept sacrifices will be more ready to deal with the sacrifices of marriage, and will appreciate each other that much more.  Plus, if you are suffering because you are apart from someone, it really speaks volumes as to how you feel about them. Many couples these days seem to (even if not in words, but in actions) have an "I can take him/her or leave him/her" approach to a relationship, and probably wouldn’t suffer a minute if apart.

Finally we have prayer and communication. Praying is an obvious relationship strengthener for Christians. Relying on God through constant prayer is
not only the best way to approach an issue, but when both people in a
relationship pray, the foundation of the relationship is the strongest one available: prayer. Maria and I have had to make prayer the foundation of our relationship. We have had no other choice, and we are much better off for it. Had we not had the distance between us, it is hard to tell if we would have prayed as much. And at last, we have communication. Long-distance relationships require communication, in greater quality and quantity than short-distance ones, simply because of the nature of the relationship. When you are apart physically you have to rely on communication. You have no choice but to get to know the other person in a non-physical way. While I certainly believe you have to get to know a person physically, most couples have this (and sometimes too much of it!) down pat but have some trouble on the communication end. It is getting more common to hear nowadays, "We don’t get along and have nothing in common, but he/she is so hot, I can’t leave," or something similar.

I do not always deal with my long-distance relationship in the best way, and neither does Maria, Carmel, or Jonathan. This is not to put any of us down, but to simply acknowledge the truth that exists in all relationships. However, these times can be times of growth and moving closer through increased honesty and communication. Long-distance relationships can be tough, but if you have found that special someone, they are definitely worth it. I hope this helps those in and/or beginning long-distance relationships.

Addendum: As a believer in health and nutrition, I also think exercise and good eating habits can play a role in the emotional health of ANY relationship. Exercise, certain vitamins, minerals, fats, amino acids, and herbs have been shown to positively affect emotional health and even alleviate cases of mild depression. Plus, it doesn’t hurt either person to take care of him/herself